Change

Members of 12-step programs are familiar with what we call the Serenity Prayer:

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference."

For us -- and for everyone else -- the things we cannot change are usually the same: the actions, words and personalities of other people; and the things that happen around us over which we, as individuals, have no control.  The husband who believes that a meal isn't complete without meat or fish.  The friend who mostly likes to hear herself speak.  The flight that is delayed, again.  The pain in our right neck and shoulder when we use our phone or tablet for too long.

The things we can, as individuals, change are our own actions and reactions.  We can prepare a delicious vegetarian meal, and add some meat just for him.  We can interrupt our friend gently, saying "I have something equally interesting I'd like to share when you're finished.". We can go get a drink and a snack while waiting for the flight, talk to the person at the next table, and make a new friend.  We can set a timer so that we remember to put down our gadgets, get up and move around.

Leo Tolstoy once wrote. "Everybody thinks of changing humanity and nobody thinks of changing himself."  This is another facet of the same subject.  Humanity can change, and has changed, and those changes were brought about because individuals did something, or said something.  Many people live longer because of better sanitation, better medical care, and a better understanding of how to care for ourselves.  Many people have a voice in their own government because their predecessors raised their voices and took action to change things.  And I'd like to think that, as a result of the "#metoo" movement, women will be treated differently in the future.